Appreciation

The doctor looked at me and said, "All is well that end's well." His calm, sincere tone suddenly made me feel much better. Ever heard "leaders stay calm in the midst of chaos." This doctor was a good leader.

On January 13 I facilitated a meeting for 80 people in Las Vegas. During the meeting I realized I couldn't see anything above about seven feet. Then the lights in the room started exploding, except they were only exploding for me. Being the exceptionally astute person I am, I thought, "I need new glasses." So I went to the optometrist, who said, "Something is very, very wrong. I'm sending you to an ophthalmologist." So I went to the ophthalmologist. I sat in the waiting room and started to really worry.

My work is reading, listening, collaborating, writing, and speaking. In a nutshell, it helps to be able to see. I thought I was losing my eyesight. I walked in to meet the doctor, and he said, "How are you?" I said, "I've had better days." He said, "All is well that ends well." He took my concern off of the short term and turned it to the long term. Suddenly, I started to relax. He showed me the x-rays of my eye and explained that I had a partially detached retina. Now why didn't I think of that? He said, "The good news is I can fix that. The bad news is you can't fly for the next eight weeks."

Since 100% of my clients are outside of the city I live in, St. Louis, this posed a tad bit of a problem. My first thoughts were all negative ones. I was worried about the short term again. And then an amazing thing happened. Out of all the lessons I've learned from this life experience the biggest one was an overwhelming sense of appreciation.

A New Reality

It all happened when I realized the doctor said, "YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO FLY FOR THE NEXT EIGHT WEEKS." He didn't say, "I suggest you don't fly for eight weeks," or "It's not a good idea to fly for the next eight weeks." Once I understood that I was dealing with a new reality, I had to stop thinking that the world was the same as it had always been. In the past ten years, I don't think I've ever gone eight weeks without traveling to a distant city. But that was the past. Now I had to come up with a new plan. And this is where the appreciation part comes in.

Has your reality changed in any way over the past year that you need to accept and embrace?

From Potential Crisis to Cherished Moments

Since I couldn't fly, what could I do? Specifically, what could I do that I wasn't doing in the past? Three things came to mind: be with my wife and our two kids a LOT, lose weight, and finish the dozen small projects for my business that I never seemed to have the time to do. I've wanted to be with my wife and kids more for ages, and occasionally it works out that way. But to be a family of four everyday for eight weeks seemed like a dream. To have dinner together every night, to wake up and be able to get my kids out of bed, to play soccer in the basement, to be able to play checkers and watch their dance practices and share "Best Thing/Worst Thing" every night at the dinner table, and be with my wife on a regular basis. It all seemed to be to good to be true.

And I've been wanting to lose 15 pounds for, oh, about 6 years. I was able to drop 12 while I was "grounded." To be able to focus on working out and eating properly, and actually use Bob Greene's advice, turned out to be another huge blessing.

The third area I got an opportunity to focus on was completing a host of business projects that have been hanging out there waiting for just the "right moment" to be completed. Unfortunately, that "right moment" just never seemed to appear.

What have you been putting off that you need to cherish?

Appreciate All of Your Gifts

Then there was the eye. To be able to see out of both eyes normally was suddenly like a miracle. I had always taken my eyes for granted. But when you think you might lose one of those suckers, they suddenly become very, very valuable. Obviously the same goes for a finger, a hand, an arm, a foot, or a leg. Cherish all the gifts you might be taking for granted.

What treasures do you have that you have always taken for granted?

The Journey

There was one trip I had to make. I was scheduled to be the keynote speaker at the Annual Meat Conference, which is a dynamic gathering of suppliers and retailers who supply and buy meat and poultry for grocery stores from butcher shops to supermarkets, supercenters, warehouse clubs, and organic stores. The speech was in Orlando, which is only 1080 miles from my home. The doc said, "You can give the speech. You just can't fly." So with a patch over my eye I set out for my five day round trip adventure.

Again, it turned out to be another lesson in appreciation. I started to appreciate the airplanes I had complained so much about in the past. I appreciated the opportunity to listen to an extraordinary 8-CD program called, "Team of Rivals: The Political Genius of Abraham Lincoln." I had the chance to envision what the future could look like. I had the opportunity to think through the details of my keynote message, and refine nuances I otherwise may not have discovered.

How can you turn your long journeys into experiences that you appreciate?

Appreciate Your Mentors

While I'm on the topic of appreciation, I want to share one more story. In December I came across a book by Denzel Washington called, "A Hand to Guide Me." It was about people who influenced him and guided him when he was young. And then a variety of other people wrote about the people who influenced them. I thought, "This would make a perfect gift for the people who have guided me throughout my life." My parents are awesome, but I put them in a different category. This book was for my mentors, those individuals who intervened at key moments and provided me with the guidance I needed to move forward.

I started writing down a list of my key mentors at each stage in my life. When I got to ten names I knew this was going to be a wee bit expensive. I ended up with sixteen names. Two are siblings, one was my first grade soccer coach, one was my seventh grade teacher, two were high school teachers, one was my college soccer coach, one was my first boss, one was my second boss, one was a minister, and the others influenced my work today. I had to Google several of them to track them down. And then I sent the books out. It was just my way of saying thank you to each of them.

Find Value in the "Worst of Times"

My point in sharing all of this with you is that even the strangest moments, even the potential catastrophes, could turn out to be unbelievably useful and wonderful experiences. Deal with the reality you've been handed and look for ways to turn it to your advantage. Accelerating your career and your business results doesn't always mean that everything happens in a linear fashion. Sometimes you're hit by an event that takes you off on a tangent. Find ways to make those moments just as powerful as the normal moments.

Book Recommendations

The Greatest Miracle in the World, by Og Mandino

This is probably the best book I've ever read on appreciating all the things we take for granted everyday.

A Hand to Guide Me, by Denzel Washington

This book is not only inspiring to read, I think it makes a wonderful gift for the people who have guided you throughout your lifetime.

Bonus

My second book, Accelerate: 20 Practical Lessons to Boost Business Momentum (279-pages, Hardcover, Kaplan Publishing) is coming to stores everywhere books are available on May 1st. In this book I've distilled 3,000 hours of on-site executive coaching over a ten-year period at places like Toyota, McDonald's, Marriott, St. Louis Cardinals, and Coca-Cola into 20 management lessons to propel your business and your career forward.

If you want to learn more about Accelerate, click here.

New White Paper – Accelerate Your Strengths

On June 16th I gave a half-day seminar on “Accelerate Your Strengths: practical ideas to boost business momentum” for GE Capital. It was such an interesting project that I wrote a white paper for the group after the seminar based on what we talked about. In turn, that white paper was forwarded on to 7,000 GE employees. Consequently, I thought you might like to read the paper, except this version has all the references to GE taken out. Here is the link for the

Accelerate Your Strengths white paper: http://thecoughlincompany.com/accellerate_your_strengths.html

New Book, Find a Way to Win: Management Insights from Terry Michler, America's All-Time Winningest Soccer Coach

This book focuses on business lessons that can be learned from soccer. The foundation of the book is how Terry Michler used the powerful simplicity of Dutch soccer to win more games than any other U.S. coach in history.

On July 11th, the finals of the 2010 World Cup in South Africa between Holland and Spain was watched by more than 700 million people. While I was cheering for Holland at the beginning of the game, a major decision by their coach led me to learning a valuable lesson all over again.

Dutch soccer, which is highlighted in my book, is all based on extraordinary technical skill, efficiency, and precise attacking soccer. This is how a country with only 16 million people competes so extraordinarily well with the world's super powers in soccer including number-one ranked Brazil, whom they beat in the quarterfinals. However, in the World Cup finals Holland abandoned what made them great and instead focused on playing brutal, violent soccer. They wanted to intimidate Spain, and in the end they lost the game and the respect of so many people who love Dutch soccer. What happened and why did they do it?

They felt they couldn't compete with Spain if they allowed them to get into their normal passing game. So they consciously decided to physically attack the Spanish players with violent tackles all over the field. One Dutch player even shoved his metal cleats into the chest of a Spanish player. They received numerous yellow cards, a red card, and ridicule from the world-wide soccer press after the game.

What's the lesson to learn here for every business? Stay true to who you are. When the prize is close don't abandon what got you to be one of the best organizations in your industry. Too many companies in the past ten years have decided that what made them very, very good wasn't going to be enough to make them number one in their industry, and so they got away from their strengths. Big mistake.

I believe Holland will return to their traditional style of play, focus on precise, skillful, attacking soccer, and get away from their violent style of play. I think they learned a huge lesson. And hopefully every business that got away from its core strength in the pursuit of being bigger and more successful financially than anyone else in the industry will also return to its core and get back to winning again.

You can learn more about Find a Way to Win at http://thecoughlincompany.com/book_store.html

Republishing Articles

Each month my e-newsletter gets republished in approximately 20 blogs, on-line publications, and internal publications for businesses, universities, and not-for-profit organizations. If you would like to republish all or part of my monthly articles, please send me an e-mail at dan@thecoughlincompany.com with "Republishing Article" in the subject heading. I will send you the article in a word document. All I ask is that you include my name as the author of the article and a short paragraph at the end of the article about me with a link to my website.

Take care and have a great month!

Dan Coughlin

Back to Newsletter Page

P.O. Box 1245 Fenton, Missouri 63026
Phone 636.825.6611 Fax 636.825.9831
E-mail info@thecoughlincompany.com